Back Into The Swing Of Things

Hi all,

So I've been slacking a bit when it comes to doing the things that I love. For instance, I love to sing, but I haven't been singing much lately. I listen to beautiful songs everyday, but I haven't been humming and singing along like normal. I just kind of sit there, hearing the song, but not really taking in the lyrics--the true meaning. 

But the main thing--the biggest passion of mine--that I've been neglecting, is writing. As you may be able to tell, I haven't been writing much of anything. When I first started blogging, it was all about writing and letting random people get to know my deepest inner thoughts. Then I took everything down and made a new blog--this one. And it's not the same. I think that's because I was afraid to be real and just share my thoughts with strangers. I have this crazy feeling that no one cares, or they'll think I'm weird for thinking certain things or saying certain things. Which is ridiculous, and I know that. It's the anxiety talking.

I've realized in the last few months that I care way too much about being judged than I care about having a voice. I don't know why, but I always put myself inside of this box that only allows me to do what I think other people will like, instead of doing what I love.

So today I'm fixing that. I'm changing my attitude--which is not an overnight process by any means--and saying screw it! Here I am. In the flesh. Raw and original. I am going to write more, sing more, be more of myself. It's the only way I know how to be. 

But if anyone ever feels this way... like you're kind of just floating by with the tide instead of fighting against the current, don't give up. Instead, why not just swim?

- Lily <3